Imitation Is Better Than Flattery!

Would copying help?

In an exam, yes, as long as you don’t get caught. It life, it works too. If you do it without making it look obvious.

Imitation, as they say, is the best form of flattery. In psychology, imitating someone is called Mirroring. Also called Isopraxism, Mirroring, is a neurobehaviour we display in which we copy others, their speech patterns, vocabulary, tempo, tone of voice and body language – for our benefit!

If you don’t believe, look at young couples who have just fallen in love. You will see them walking in the beach with their steps in perfect synchrony. You can spot newlyweds standing in almost similar manner.

The operating words here are ‘just fallen in love’ and ‘newly weds’. Since passage of time tends to change things drastically.

Psychologist Richard Wiseman did a study using restaurant waiters to understand if Mirroring worked better than waiters flattering their customers. He wanted to know how waiters could connect with total strangers.

He made one group of waiters lavish praise on customers, who ordered, using words like ‘That’s a great choice’, ‘No problem, I can do this for you’ etc.

He made the other group of waiters just Mirror the customers language. After the customer gave the order, the waiters noted down the order and simply repeated it to the customers to ensure they had got it right.

The average tip of the waiters who Mirrored the customers were 70% more than those who flattered!

You don’t need to be only a waiter to practice Mirroring. It will help if you are in Sales too. When you wish to build rapport with your customer, subtly imitate his behaviour during the sales interaction. If he folds his hands, do the same slowly and subtly. Your client will feel a sense of acquaintanceship and comfort with you – starting point for a successful conversation!

Mirroring works. Irrespective of whether you wish to induce or seduce someone!